Thoughts on the Soul, and how i believe it can be transformed (12.23.01)

What is the Soul?

From my Dear yet Conflicting* (I have my gripes, but that may be for another diary.) Friend Wikipedia:

"In many religious and philosophical traditions, the soul is the spiritual essence of a person, which includes one's identity, personality, and memories, an immaterial aspect or essence of a living being that is believed to be able to survive physical death. The concept of the soul is generally applied to humans, though it can also be applied to other living or even non-living entities, as in animism."

Other popular depictions of the soul.

But of course, you don't need Me to Explain any of That :0] - As per the Wikipedia Explanation , i Personally believe that is not an Apt enough description of What a "Soul" is , yes - A Soul is different to all who percieve it, and that is the point. I prefer it being descripted as any Sixth Sense (A perception beyond the five) That you Connect to the Self (as you Or To Direct You E.T.C) To Broaden the Term................... Anyway.................... What do I See? Well, I see many Things. I believe the Soul is an object or organ That is not Physical, It can only be Percieved. It is not Essential to all Nor is as strongly Felt in All, but it very much Is there. There are also Numerous Types of Souls, Someone can have Multiple Souls in One Body, Multiple Selves Sharing one Soul, A Fragmented Soul, a Fake Soul, A Lost Soul, Someone Else's Soul, and Such. A soul is not static. It is tranformed across A Plane, It is Fluid, It is Oobleck, It is Plasmic, It is all. When I feel My Soul, I feel it in my Chest, Nestled right Below the Diaphragam, Shaped Like a Heart. My Soul Has Sustained many Clonings, and Tears, And Peckings. It's Real Fragile So I Have to uh, Treat It With Care.......... Many of us must keep this in mind.

Components of the soul

Aura (What dims or brightens)

Hollow inside (What grows Full or Leaks out/Is empty)

How to treat the soul

Communication Chamber (how your soul connects itself to you and others, Cruel and Naughty forces can also Confuse this Chamber and Lure it Out , Deceiving it with Your False Voice - Much like Jacob fooling Isaac Out of Esau's Blessing with Hair of Goat Draped On his Fingers)

(A drawing of my soul, in simplified form.) I see my Soul as Slightly a Different Entity Than Myself, It has It's Own Desires and Fears As do I. Like Plover In the Teeth of the Crocodillian, Frog protecting the Eggs of the Spider, Zooids Attached. It is a Symbiosis (Sometimes Parasitic). It's Very hard, Almost Painfully So, But you have to be Gentle with Your Soul. Remember - A SOUL IS FRAGILE! It is like a snail, a young and orphaned Snail, and you Are a giant Shell for it to habitate in......... Hmm that's Hermit Crabs. Whatever. Who cares. As I was saying, It's weak, Squishy, and small - Just like a normal smooth muscle organ. Y'can't Give up on It Because You aren't in Tune. You can't Evict it Because It Is poisoned, You shouldn't Damage it to Damage you...

Can't, Shouldn't... Those sound very Strict. I Don't Like That. At all. I'm sorry. Revision. There are Many ways a Soul can be Damaged, Cloned, Evicted, Become Posioned, Lost, Killed, Faded, more. Most common examples are trauma, mental distress, self harm, or Otherspirtual Beings that are working together to Harm your Soul. It's not quite fair, but Very Little People keep a perfectly HEALTHY soul.... Not something to be ashamed of, Though. not AT all. Remember How I mentioned Souls are Fluid? Just like The body, It can Sustain Damage and Heal, And all of Us have been Injured Before.

When a Soul has sustained trauma or stress, It will often replace itself with a fake self to take the damage (sometimes can become another soul), Run from your body, Make a demonic clone to harm The Body out of Fear, Hide Deeper in your Body, or be Cruel to you. In Return, You are Cruel to it, You starve it, You beat it, You choke it. But you Are Symbiotic Beings. Your Soul is a Part of you and Vice Versa. Gentleness is a skill That is good to learn. It is Frustrating, But when you and your soul are not getting along, you are both so damaged you Just want to burn it all, Sometimes you need to give each other space to allow each other to calm down, or Offer a gentle paw. At Times, Your Soul will Speak to you, it will cry, laugh, nothing to you About What it Needs. I need love, I need food, I need a clean Space, i need to Read, I need to talk. Maybe You already know what It Needed (Which leads to more anger (⇀‸↼‶)) But other times you won't. Take The Advice to Heart, Do what Your Soul Needs. See how it Makes the Both of You Feel....

No way is perfect, I don't dictate how you feel at peace. But here are some of my personal scrawls of achieving this. It can be difficult. But also, it's alright to let that ugliness flow through. The guilt, the shame, the regret, the dirt, The Hatred, The Madness, The Mania, The Paranoia, the Depression,The Distrust, The violent, the Jealousy, The Betrayal.. It is vital You allow yourself a Conduit to Also express These Without The Snuffing/Prolonged Torture of Them. Therapists Will Froth at me for this and um, No Hate to Anyone who DO find these Methods Extremely Effective (Good For you! I'm Proud. (o_ _)ﾉ彡☆) But Frankly I find the use in Snapping a rubber band around my Wrist each time I think about Things That would Get me A One-Way Ticket to the Electric Chair or "Maybe they had a bad day"-Ing my Way out of somebody making a damn fool out of me completely redundant and avoiding the true problem. These are what bring Big-toothed Grins and eloquently folded hands and deep sighs of Pride from the bellies of Psycho-Therappists Because You Are Beginning to Finally Act like A Normal Being and that means They're One Step closer to "Figuring You Out." and possibly Finding some New Patient Who isn't Such a Mindsore. I'm sorry. i can't. I'm Bitter. I'm reluctant. I have experience That makes me Want to Burn down every Psychiatric Institution from Pole to Pole. I Would Cut Off My Own Foot for a FlameThrower and A Private Jet Just for this Purpose. I Can Smell It. I Can Hear The Sceams. I see how They assist on The Creeping Fears, But the Deeper Grooves and Grottos...? They need more Than a few spurtz of Silly String down their caverns to Fill any of That.

Bah I went off on Quite The Tangent There !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahaha VeryveryVeryVerySorry Hahahhahahahahhahaaha. \(; -_-)――――――C<―_-) ( Pictured : Present Day Rosemary (Right now, if you were curious ) Blasts Laser Beam at a Slight While ago Rosemary , oil on canvas 12.23.2001. Boy oh Boy do you see how CLOSE It is to Christmas? ^-^ / ? Have youuuu been good this year....? I Sure Have. I'm Very Good.) But Ahem, As I was Saying (Pictured, Me Fixing my Tie) Y'gotta let the grooves seep And Groan and BLEED to Feel like a Living Actualized Person Too. Fried Dopamine Receptors Saying All This I'm Aware And I Know how It can Sound Counterintuitive When Most pain Isn't Even Cathartic or Self Actualizing At All But When Your Soul is Having Trouble AT Times it Can Be Best to Let it Bleed and Watch........ Not Mockingly, Or Judingly.. Even if It Hurts Like Hell, Sometimes It needs The Space to Cry and So Do You While Knowing That There is Someone There to Hold Them and Blabber Disgustingly In their Shoulder to be Rocked and Caressed and Whispered "I am Here, It's Alright. I unde" When They Need it Be.

(Pictured : Soul hug ) Even when you and Your Soul Have Had your Great Bleeds, Your Rebirths, Your Healings, Your Space................................ There Will Still be Scars and Dents in Your Soul. this Can frustrate Many, I Would be Lying if I said I Was Exempt...................................................................................... No Matter how much Healing, Saving, Rebuilding, The Soul will still be a Little Damaged, Or Grow Damaged As you Live more Life. Some of Us were born with Broken Dirty Souls From Almost Birth, Misfortune and Bad Luck Following at a Young Age. Sometimes It is Accumulated Pricks, Like Asbestos Fibers, Scratching one by one at the muscle of the lungs until You can No longer Breathe and the Chunks of your Smoothness are Coughed up as Ragged Wicked chunks On the Front of your Shirt. Others...? The Weight of Responsibility as you get Older and Experience More can Wear on the Soul, Or Factors Such as Society or Just Being Alive Can Pick and Dig. A HEALTHY soul will not Neccesarily Have be Shiny, Plump, and Red with No MARKS anymore........................... (infact it may not even Look like a Heart, That Is How I see Mine!) & Healthy and unhealthy Are Extremely Prone to Change. There is no Need to Grow dissapointed if your Soul Still has Cracks Despite what you have done. That Does not Mean you Have Failed. You will have marks of living, just as you do on Your Physical body. Scars from Accidents or Purposeful Digging, Wrinkles, Sags, The Aches, E.t.C, E.T.c......... You need Each other More than You Think.

When i find myself Ignoring my Soul Sometimes I have to Open My Ear, Just to Hear What I have to say, And Hopefully, She will Whisper out To me, And I will Take it to Heart, and Have a Nice Long Conversation........................................................................................ Alright That's All for This Diary Entry. Farewell.